By DaysWithDave
Published: March 22, 2010
Riding high after he scored his historic win with the House passage of the Senate Health Care Reform bill, HR 4872, the Reconciliation Act of 2010, Obama quickly launched into his next domestic priority with the March Madness Correction Bill.
The President’s new priority is aimed at helping the millions of Americans that are still employed participating in office pools for the 2010 NCAA Men’s Basketball Championship Tournament, as well as the unemployed betting on college games through a bookie or online gambling.
“Millions of Americans have participated this year in this annual pastime of filling out a sixty-four slot bracket to predict who will win the NCAA men’s basketball championship,” Obama said to reporters after commenting on the House’s courage in moving the cause of universal health care coverage forward.
“We promised the country change,” the President went on and added, “and we delivered that change today. Now it’s time to move on to other issues the American people are deeply concerned about, as am I.”
President Obama then shocked the press pool by announcing that his next congressional priority will be to have Congress overturn some of the results of the first 4 days of the 2010 to help ease many Americans’ psyche’s as well as give them a fresh start at winning their office pools.
Obama went into campaign mode and offered, “I know many Americans are hurting right now. I’m hurting. I picked both Kansas and Villanova to be in the Final Four in my bracket. I know that many of you also picked these two teams to make it to the Final Four. I know the majority of all office pool participants picked the Jayhawks to win it all. That’s why I’m calling on Congress to pass legislation overturning the results of the games affecting most of America.”
Adding to the urgency of his call the President demanded that Congress pass this legislation by the time he returns from Asia as, “the Sweet Sixteen starts this Thursday and the American People are counting on us to get this done.”
President Obama appears to have close to a plurality of support in the House but is yet again going to have to deal with the Democrat’s Pro-Life wing led by their figurehead, Bart Stupak of Michigan.
Representative Stupak said in a press conference, “Although I agree with President Obama that the majority of the American people are suffering with the shocking losses by several top seeds in this year’s March Madness office pools, I can’t get behind this bill without the assurance that no current participant in the tournament be allowed to have or order an abortion.”
Republicans have already come out in opposition to Obama’s latest agenda. Minority Leader John Boehner was the first to speak up saying, “The American people are against this socialization of American Collegiate sports. If Democrats insist on altering the office pool brackets of proud Americans they will find themselves out of jobs come November.”
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Scott Brown To File Amendment To Divert Stimulus Funds
By DaysWithDave
Published: March 11, 2010
US Senator Scott Brown, the latest entrant to the 100 member body and newly minted “superstar” of the Republican Party plans to file an amendment tomorrow to redirect unspent stimulus money to upgrade GMC trucks for American workers.
The amendment titled, “Immediate Truck Relief for America’s Workers,” would provide tax credits for millions of American workers who drive GMC trucks to upgrade their vehicles.
The tax credit will allow truck drivers to acquire new truck bed tool boxes, snow tires, truck nuts, and custom details to help the American worker increase their truck based business.
“The best way to revive our economy is to spur job creation by allowing workers who drive trucks to save money on their truck costs. Whether they drive green GMC trucks, or blue GMC trucks, or black GMC trucks, or whatever color trucks. This bill will allow those truck drivers to hire new workers to work out of those trucks,” Brown said.
When asked if this bill could be used to upgrade the green GMC truck he rode to victory in his historic upset election win Brown responded, “I drive a truck! That truck is owned by the people of Massachusetts! What they decide to do with it is there decision and not Washington’s or the media!”
Former Republican Senator of Tennessee and failed Presidential candidate, Fred Thompson is expected to give an enthusiastic endorsement of Brown’s amendment shortly.
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Published: March 11, 2010
US Senator Scott Brown, the latest entrant to the 100 member body and newly minted “superstar” of the Republican Party plans to file an amendment tomorrow to redirect unspent stimulus money to upgrade GMC trucks for American workers.
The amendment titled, “Immediate Truck Relief for America’s Workers,” would provide tax credits for millions of American workers who drive GMC trucks to upgrade their vehicles.
The tax credit will allow truck drivers to acquire new truck bed tool boxes, snow tires, truck nuts, and custom details to help the American worker increase their truck based business.
“The best way to revive our economy is to spur job creation by allowing workers who drive trucks to save money on their truck costs. Whether they drive green GMC trucks, or blue GMC trucks, or black GMC trucks, or whatever color trucks. This bill will allow those truck drivers to hire new workers to work out of those trucks,” Brown said.
When asked if this bill could be used to upgrade the green GMC truck he rode to victory in his historic upset election win Brown responded, “I drive a truck! That truck is owned by the people of Massachusetts! What they decide to do with it is there decision and not Washington’s or the media!”
Former Republican Senator of Tennessee and failed Presidential candidate, Fred Thompson is expected to give an enthusiastic endorsement of Brown’s amendment shortly.
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Friday, March 5, 2010
BREAKING: Sarah Palin to leave Fox News
By DaysWithDave
Published: March 5, 2010
Sarah Palin, the former Governor of Alaska and failed candidate for Vice President of the United States in the 2008 election has announced that she is now leaving her job as Fox News contributor to concentrate on comedy.
Attending Jay Leno’s return to the Tonight Show, she was given a chance to try her hand at stand-up on comedy’s biggest stage. Most comedians have to spend years working their way up the ladder, paying their dues to get this spot and many do not make it. Some that do make it there bomb.
Not so for America’s Next Top Comedian. The former Governor nailed her routine as the audience reaction and laugh track showed. Some media pundits noted her ease in the new gig and her lack of visible notes on her hand aside from the opening gag.
Her comedy routine has catapulted her back into the spotlight with every cable news channel commenting on her performance (with mostly glowing reviews) and the Governor now feels that this is the best way for her to help America and Alaska.
Palin’s comedy routine gained her an invitation to perform at Zanies Comedy Club, which she has hinted at recently is her dream job.
Her latest job change was announced via memo with Palin’s spokeswoman Mehgan Stapleton on hand to answer questions.
Asked why Palin was quitting yet another job, Stapleton corrected the questioner by noting that, “Sarah Palin has always done what is right for the American people and the people of Alaska. She feels that if she were to continue as a Fox News contributor she would be handicapped by the liberal media in her attempt to help the American people.”
Stapleton added that, “Governor Palin could better help the lower 48 in her new role as a comedian. If they’re able to laugh, they’re able to forget about paying such high taxes and giving up their second amendment rights.”
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Published: March 5, 2010
Sarah Palin, the former Governor of Alaska and failed candidate for Vice President of the United States in the 2008 election has announced that she is now leaving her job as Fox News contributor to concentrate on comedy.
Attending Jay Leno’s return to the Tonight Show, she was given a chance to try her hand at stand-up on comedy’s biggest stage. Most comedians have to spend years working their way up the ladder, paying their dues to get this spot and many do not make it. Some that do make it there bomb.
Not so for America’s Next Top Comedian. The former Governor nailed her routine as the audience reaction and laugh track showed. Some media pundits noted her ease in the new gig and her lack of visible notes on her hand aside from the opening gag.
Her comedy routine has catapulted her back into the spotlight with every cable news channel commenting on her performance (with mostly glowing reviews) and the Governor now feels that this is the best way for her to help America and Alaska.
Palin’s comedy routine gained her an invitation to perform at Zanies Comedy Club, which she has hinted at recently is her dream job.
Her latest job change was announced via memo with Palin’s spokeswoman Mehgan Stapleton on hand to answer questions.
Asked why Palin was quitting yet another job, Stapleton corrected the questioner by noting that, “Sarah Palin has always done what is right for the American people and the people of Alaska. She feels that if she were to continue as a Fox News contributor she would be handicapped by the liberal media in her attempt to help the American people.”
Stapleton added that, “Governor Palin could better help the lower 48 in her new role as a comedian. If they’re able to laugh, they’re able to forget about paying such high taxes and giving up their second amendment rights.”
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Bunning To Head To Cooperstown To Halt Induction Of 2010 Hall Of Fame Class
By DaysWithDave
Published: March 2, 2010
After coming to terms with ending his one man filibuster against the extension of unemployment benefits and COBRA coverage, Senator Jim Bunning is turning his eye to an issue close to home with him: The 2010 induction class to the Baseball Hall Of Fame.
The outgoing Senator from Kentucky announced that he would object to the induction of the class of 2010 which includes “The Hawk” Andre Dawson, as well as legendary manager, Whitey Herzog.
Asked why he was turning his attention away from Washington and towards Cooperstown, NY, Bunning replied, “Look, the American people today have to budget and figure out how they’re going to pay for things. As far as I have seen, Major League Baseball has not announced how they intend to pay for the new plaques that are going up in the Hall. I will not support them just adding to their debt.”
When it was pointed out to Senator Bunning that his election in 1996 by the Veterans Committee did not contain a plan to pay for his plaque he angrily retorted, “Did Bruce Froemming ever throw a no hitter? No! Did Joe Brinkman throw a perfect game in the World Series? No!”
When notified of Senator Bunning’s new crusade to keep him out of the Hall of Fame, Andre Dawson said it was disappointing and wondered, “Why doesn’t Jim want to copulate me?”
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Published: March 2, 2010
After coming to terms with ending his one man filibuster against the extension of unemployment benefits and COBRA coverage, Senator Jim Bunning is turning his eye to an issue close to home with him: The 2010 induction class to the Baseball Hall Of Fame.
The outgoing Senator from Kentucky announced that he would object to the induction of the class of 2010 which includes “The Hawk” Andre Dawson, as well as legendary manager, Whitey Herzog.
Asked why he was turning his attention away from Washington and towards Cooperstown, NY, Bunning replied, “Look, the American people today have to budget and figure out how they’re going to pay for things. As far as I have seen, Major League Baseball has not announced how they intend to pay for the new plaques that are going up in the Hall. I will not support them just adding to their debt.”
When it was pointed out to Senator Bunning that his election in 1996 by the Veterans Committee did not contain a plan to pay for his plaque he angrily retorted, “Did Bruce Froemming ever throw a no hitter? No! Did Joe Brinkman throw a perfect game in the World Series? No!”
When notified of Senator Bunning’s new crusade to keep him out of the Hall of Fame, Andre Dawson said it was disappointing and wondered, “Why doesn’t Jim want to copulate me?”
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
GOP Unanimous In Their Criticism Following Health Care Summit
By DaysWithDave
Published: February 25, 2010
Following the unprecedented Health Care Reform summit today involving members of both parties of the House and Senate and the White House and its administration, Republicans were in lock step in their criticisms of the event.
Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R) was the first to speak in the Republican response and immediately pounced on a point he made earlier during the summit that, “Obama got to speak for 438 minutes while we only got to speak for 52 minutes. As Dr. Coburn and Dr. Barrasso pointed out as doctors, one needs to listen when it comes to health care. This was just another photo op that the Democrat president seems to prefer over actual bipartisanship.”
House Minority Leader John Boehner was the next to speak in the GOP response and reiterated complaints that he and other Republicans brought up earlier in the day. He recalled the complaint that Democrats are not listening to the party that was voted out of power. “I’ve gone around to my constituency and beyond and everyone is telling me the same thing,” Boehner said, “We don’t want this bill that was watered down to mean nothing as far as actual reform is concerned. They want us to scrap this bill and start from scratch so that the status quo is kept in place. The current bill is as popular as a sardine sundae, heh, heh.”
Many of the GOP leadership as well as other big named Republicans got a chance to speak. One of those names was Arizona Senator Jon Kyl. Kyl seemed to show the most anger when he stated that, “This was a total waste. This was just another attempt to have the Democrat party say to us, ‘Vote for out plan or shut up.' This wasn’t a bipartisanship event; it was a high profile event to play politics. The American people deserve better than this.”
Many of the remaining speakers on the GOP side cited Obama and the Democrat party’s lack of tax cuts in their plan.
Mike Enzi (R) of Wyoming hammered the point home when he asked, “How are people going to pay for this bloated, government controlled health plan when they’re paying higher taxes to pay for illegal immigrants’ free health care and their abortions?”
The Democrats as well as the White House have not yet responded as of this filing.
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Published: February 25, 2010
Following the unprecedented Health Care Reform summit today involving members of both parties of the House and Senate and the White House and its administration, Republicans were in lock step in their criticisms of the event.
Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R) was the first to speak in the Republican response and immediately pounced on a point he made earlier during the summit that, “Obama got to speak for 438 minutes while we only got to speak for 52 minutes. As Dr. Coburn and Dr. Barrasso pointed out as doctors, one needs to listen when it comes to health care. This was just another photo op that the Democrat president seems to prefer over actual bipartisanship.”
House Minority Leader John Boehner was the next to speak in the GOP response and reiterated complaints that he and other Republicans brought up earlier in the day. He recalled the complaint that Democrats are not listening to the party that was voted out of power. “I’ve gone around to my constituency and beyond and everyone is telling me the same thing,” Boehner said, “We don’t want this bill that was watered down to mean nothing as far as actual reform is concerned. They want us to scrap this bill and start from scratch so that the status quo is kept in place. The current bill is as popular as a sardine sundae, heh, heh.”
Many of the GOP leadership as well as other big named Republicans got a chance to speak. One of those names was Arizona Senator Jon Kyl. Kyl seemed to show the most anger when he stated that, “This was a total waste. This was just another attempt to have the Democrat party say to us, ‘Vote for out plan or shut up.' This wasn’t a bipartisanship event; it was a high profile event to play politics. The American people deserve better than this.”
Many of the remaining speakers on the GOP side cited Obama and the Democrat party’s lack of tax cuts in their plan.
Mike Enzi (R) of Wyoming hammered the point home when he asked, “How are people going to pay for this bloated, government controlled health plan when they’re paying higher taxes to pay for illegal immigrants’ free health care and their abortions?”
The Democrats as well as the White House have not yet responded as of this filing.
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
House Minority Leader Complains That White House Health Care Summit Is Too Short
By DaysWithDave
Published: February 25, 2010
Ahead of today’s Health Care summit with the white house, House Minority Leader, John Boehner (R) has a new complaint – that the summit to resolve the Health Care Reform gridlock is too short.
Appearing on Fox News yesterday the Republican leader said, “The fact of the matter is, this White House can’t expect two years of trying to take over one-sixth of our economy to be wrapped up in a few hours. I’ve attended brunches that were longer than that.”
Asked about Boehner’s latest criticism at today’s daily press briefing, White House spokesperson Robert Gibbs bitingly replied, “I’m sure that if we were notified earlier we could have found Goldilocks a meeting length that wasn’t too long, wasn’t too short, but just right.”
The summit begins today at 9a.m, (EST)
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Published: February 25, 2010
Ahead of today’s Health Care summit with the white house, House Minority Leader, John Boehner (R) has a new complaint – that the summit to resolve the Health Care Reform gridlock is too short.
Appearing on Fox News yesterday the Republican leader said, “The fact of the matter is, this White House can’t expect two years of trying to take over one-sixth of our economy to be wrapped up in a few hours. I’ve attended brunches that were longer than that.”
Asked about Boehner’s latest criticism at today’s daily press briefing, White House spokesperson Robert Gibbs bitingly replied, “I’m sure that if we were notified earlier we could have found Goldilocks a meeting length that wasn’t too long, wasn’t too short, but just right.”
The summit begins today at 9a.m, (EST)
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Orly Taitz To Sue The Harlem Globetrotters In Attempt To Have Washington Generals Declared Winners
By DaysWithDave
Published: February 23, 2010
Orly Taitz is back in the news with her latest lawsuit. This time she is filing a lawsuit against the Harlem Globetrotters with the intent of nullifying their victories and declaring the Washington Generals the winners of every game.
Filing her case in the United States 2nd District Court in the case of Louis “Red” Klotz v. Harlem Globetrotters, Orly hopes to prove that the basketball team billed from Harlem, NY is ineligible to be victorious in any of their games.
The main contention of Orly Taitz’s latest court case hedges on several arguments against the Globetrotters with all asserting the team’s victories to be fraudulent.
One argument she is presenting is the case of Curly Neal consistently throwing a bucket of water in the referee’s face. This act should have disqualified his team and the fact that it wasn’t is proof of collusion between the Harlem Globetrotters and the referees, and as such the Generals should have their record altered to reflect the true results.
The most popular argument among the “Globers” that Orly leads is the contention that several Harlem Globetrotters played under false names and as such, their wins should be overturned. Along with Curly Neal mentioned above, Taitz’s suit singles out Meadowlark Lemon as the main defendant based on the number of “false victories” achieved while he was leading the team.
Orly Taitz’s case is a long shot but she has a die hard following rooting for her and that includes many beyond the Washington Generals and their fans.
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Published: February 23, 2010
Orly Taitz is back in the news with her latest lawsuit. This time she is filing a lawsuit against the Harlem Globetrotters with the intent of nullifying their victories and declaring the Washington Generals the winners of every game.
Filing her case in the United States 2nd District Court in the case of Louis “Red” Klotz v. Harlem Globetrotters, Orly hopes to prove that the basketball team billed from Harlem, NY is ineligible to be victorious in any of their games.
The main contention of Orly Taitz’s latest court case hedges on several arguments against the Globetrotters with all asserting the team’s victories to be fraudulent.
One argument she is presenting is the case of Curly Neal consistently throwing a bucket of water in the referee’s face. This act should have disqualified his team and the fact that it wasn’t is proof of collusion between the Harlem Globetrotters and the referees, and as such the Generals should have their record altered to reflect the true results.
The most popular argument among the “Globers” that Orly leads is the contention that several Harlem Globetrotters played under false names and as such, their wins should be overturned. Along with Curly Neal mentioned above, Taitz’s suit singles out Meadowlark Lemon as the main defendant based on the number of “false victories” achieved while he was leading the team.
Orly Taitz’s case is a long shot but she has a die hard following rooting for her and that includes many beyond the Washington Generals and their fans.
DaysWithDave is a contributing writer to The Internets.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
